The last few days I have been faced with self evaluation. I’ve discovered that I have been holding myself back due to fear. FEAR! This thing is a horrible thing and it can be passed on to others. Fear is contagious so be careful on how you allow it to affect you. Fear, the debilitating reaction we can have. Well this can prevent us from evading danger if there is too much of it and it can also keep us from reaching our potential in life.
I know that I’m not the only one to have kept themselves back. I can think of a couple times that I turned down opportunities due to fear. The fear wasn’t specific to the fear of failure, but rather, it was fear of hurting or disappointing others. This was a major fault for me to realize. It hurts when you have to come to terms with your own bad choices. Aside from the fear to go for it, fear can interfere with relationships.
Relationships can be hard to develop when you are not brave enough to open up completely to your significant other. It is important to express the things that you’re unsure of in order to reduce the chance of letting anxiety push away the ones you love. Fear can also prevent you from making the necessary moves you need to make to level up. You know that for things to go to the next level of your relationship you are going to have to make some changes. Fear can keep you trapped in your comfort zone, killing the momentum you need to prepare for the level up. Fear can also have you running away from what you’ve been praying for. That’s me! It came and I didn’t know what to do with it. I think I was in shock like, naaaaw, this is waaaay to good to be true. Thus, overreacting and potentially ruining your only chance at true love forever. If you are religious, it can also come in between you and your relationship with your almighty.
I recently came to terms with the fact that I allowed fear, in one of its forms, to keep me from continuing my relationship with mine. I allowed myself to be affected by the hypocrisy of those within the church. It made it difficult for me to believe in something that has been shown to be of multiple sources and not a single culmination. I had seen other history related stories that seem to debunk the bible as an original work. However, I also believe that the majority of religions have a common theme. To exude love as you wish to receive it. Peace within that shines throughout tends to resonate among the theologies of faith. As I started to listen to some gospel music, it slapped me in the face. It was then that I realized that I needed to be accountable and make a decision. To believe is a choice. Whomever you choose, you were given the right to choose them. Mine made it clear that it would not be forced upon us. It is us that has to decide if we will believe in that walk or not.
What an amazing discovery. Now I have to decide whether or not I am going to commit to that walk. I know that my answer is yes, but I am concerned that my ability to ignore the opinions of others will be my hindrance. Again, fear poking out its lovely head to remind me that it hasn’t gone anywhere.
**Fear, oh fear how you annoy me so. You take over my bodily functions making me scared froze. I thought that I had conquered you way back when. Yet, here you are giving me grief again. Holding me back from the things I want. Lying to me saying, “you’ll never make it to the top”. It’s okay because my peace within keeps me clear. Even if I become scared I have an almighty friend near. So fear, you can leave me alone. For you make me aware, but you don’t make me strong.**